Yearning
by EllaBaee
Summary: "We are homesick most for the places we have never known." Searching. Looking. Longing. Yearning. Bella goes on a journey.
1. Longing

I had a yearning and an itch to write this story so here goes. I don't know how good I'll be at it but I'm giving it a try..

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"If you don't receive love from the ones who are meant to love you, you will never stop looking for it."

Robert Goolrick

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Yearning. Longing. Two words that correctly sum up my life.

Yearning for what, I don't know. Yearning for change, a new direction, love? Possibly.

Longing for change, a new direction, love? Certainly.

Change from the everyday norm my life has become, a new direction that will lead me any where except to a group of friends that don't understand me and a father that drinks too much beer and constantly smells of trout.

Love? Well that's something I've been longing for my whole life.

Love from a flighty mother who was more of an annoying best friend than from a father who always turned to ESPN to solve his problems and just love. That all encompassing, butterflies in you stomach, sweaty palms kind of love. The love you read about in novels. The love I wish my parents had. The love I wish I had. The love I wanted to find, not wait for to come to me.

So freshly graduated with the keys to my big rusty Chevy in my hand, my life savings from the Newton's store in my wallet and my suitcase in the passenger seat, I trekked off on a journey. A journey that I hoped would ultimately lead me to find what I was looking for.

A new direction, Maybe.

Change, Possibly.

Love, Certainly.

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Thank you for reading, and I would really love to know what you think so review if you have the time. I do plan on expanding so if you liked it you have more to look forward to.


	2. Searching

"Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can, there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did."

-Sarah Caldwell

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New York City. A city with over eight million people. Eight million possibilities.

I drove down the small congested streets looking for any place to stop and eat, and I came across a diner. I pulled into the lot parked and entered eager to get inside. It was quaint, quiet, and nearly empty. The complete antithesis of what I expected New York to be. I sat and when the waitress came to my table I ordered the first thing I saw on the menu eager just to get something in my stomach. When she delivered the meal instead of walking off she stayed and quietly gazed at me.

"Yes", I murmured a little uncomfortable with her look.

"You're new here, you don't look like you belong", she stated rather bluntly.

"I'm sorry", I stammered. "I don't know what you mean".

"You have this soft look about you. People here aren't soft"

"I'm sorry Miss..."

"Hale, Rosalie Hale"

"I'm sorry Rosalie but if I appear soft as you put it it's because you're right I'm not from here but I would like to stay".

Laughing she said "No one's forcing you to leave sweetheart-

"Bella", I interjected quietly. "My name is Bella".

"Well Bella", she started "What brings you to New York of all places"

"I don't know", I said simply, because it was the honest truth. I didn't know.

She took a long calculating look at me. I fidgeted underneath her scrutinizing gaze until she said,

"I was you once, sitting here searching for something. Longing, yearning for something, anything but not knowing what. I had to find my own way, and this city is a dangerous place to do that in, you know that right?"

"Yes I know", because I did. But I would never find myself or anything else by staying away.

"So if you know that, then why are you here?" she questioned again. I was slightly confused because I had already this.

"I told you I don't-", I began

"No", she interjected in a sharp voice. "You gave me some soft, broken excuse about not knowing why you're here that I frankly don't believe. If you're going to stay in this city you're going to need some direction or belief in why you started your so called journey to not get swept up in the life of 'Big City Lights'. So I'm going to ask you again why New York, why this city?"

In the strongest voice I could muster I told her, "Because this seemed like the best place to find what I was looking for"

"And what exactly is that?"

But when the bell rang signaling another customer she was off not giving me time to answer her question. My eyes followed her across the diner and they landed on a man with the brightest green eyes I had ever seen. And I figured I had just found it… or rather him. The man I had been searching for.

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Another chapter. If you have the time I would really love to know what you think.


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